Everything I Needed To Know About Life, I Learned Watching Sports Movies

I was watching Friday Night Lights the other day—even though I have seen Rudy, We Are Marshall, Rocky, Invictus, Seabiscuit, Invincible, The Blind Side, Remember The Titans, Karate Kid, Bull Durham, Bend It Like Beckham, The Natural, and Any Given Sunday, somehow I missed this one—and it got me thinking about why sports are such a great metaphor for life.

Here is a short list of just a few life lessons I learned watching sports movies:

1.  There will always be bad calls, you gotta just move on
2. Sometimes you gotta take one for the team
3.  Respect the coach, your teammates, the opposing team, and yourself
4. Heart will get you just as far (sometimes further) than ability
5. Don’t count out the little guy (or girl)
6. Shake hands with the opponent after every game
7. Winning is not the most important thing-- and certainly not the only thing
8. Never give up
9. Heroes come in some unlikely packages
10.  Only someone who’s played, understands 

It’s so easy to get wrapped up in daily life and the stress of getting through tough times—it’s easy to forget the important stuff that I think we’re supposed to take out of life. Sports truly can bring out the absolute best in people—I believe that. And unfortunately, I also believe that they can bring out the worst. Like in life, players make illegal hits, take performance-enhancing drugs, or game the system to their advantage. For every Tim Tebow there’s a Barry Bonds, it seems. Fickle fans (or friends) can be your best friend or your worst enemy.

So what conclusions about life can we draw from sports? Playing team sports forces us to dig deep and as a team, do more than we ever could alone. That’s why sports movies ring true: they show us what we could be on our best day, and remind us that that person is still inside of us. We just have to not forget to let him (or her) out from time to time. 

Yup, another election post

Yes, I spent the last week thinking about the same thing as everyone else: the election. Yes, I know, it’s over. Yes, you’re tired of it. I am too but before I move onto watching the new Real Housewives season, I do have some thoughts. What can I possibly add to the national conversation that hasn’t already been said? Well, the good thing (for me) is that it doesn’t matter if I have anything original to add, I live in a country where I can post whatever I want and say whatever I want! If you don’t want to read it, don’t bother.

So in this time of division and are-you-red-or-blue state, I prefer to focus on the positive: this nation and this world are changing. To me, that fact alone is intrinsically positive. And I prefer to get on board rather than get left behind.

Let me just say this outright: I am a registered Independent. Technically, I am not red or blue. I am so tired of people asking me why I constantly choose to “waste my vote” that I don’t bother discussing the intricacies of the reasoning behind my philosophy (basically, we’re never going to have a real chance at a third party unless we establish there is a voting public that’s ready for it—but that’s another post for another day).

But currently I live in a country that’s facing record unemployment, skyrocketing debt, and a huge number of the populace is uninsured, being foreclosed on, and out of options.  On the other hand, a record number of women were just made elected officials, a gay marriage bill was passed in my home state of Washington, and medical marijuana will now be available to more ill people than ever before. I say that’s progress.

It was the first (probably not the last) $2 billion election. And while everyone on the right is wondering why Romney lost, everyone on the left is wondering why anyone on the right thought Romney ever had a chance to win to begin with. While I am not Republican, I was open to a Republican candidate—because I hope I have a somewhat-open mind. I was not, however, open to candidate (and a ticket) that had two, white, rich men who spouted platitudes and didn’t seem to offer any real change.

I don’t know what the next 4 years will bring. I am up for some hope and change—and I’m also up for brilliance, innovation, acceptance and original thought. Who’s with me?  

After reading a ton of what other, much more erudite people said about this election, here are two of my favorites:

Maureen Dowd in The New York Times:

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/11/11/opinion/sunday/dowd-romney-is-president.html?src=me&ref=general

David Frum in The Daily Beast:

http://www.thedailybeast.com/newsweek/2012/11/11/how-the-republicans-got-stuck-in-the-past.html

Dennis Rodman—Bad Boy Basketball Star, Misunderstood Humanitarian (Seriously)

The other day, I read that Dennis Rodman paid for the funeral of James Byrd, the black man who was murdered in Jasper, Texas, when 3 white men dragged him to death behind their truck.

I hadn’t really thought much about the crime since 1998, when I do remember it was national news for days. People said it set race relations back decades and I certainly don’t disagree. The whole thing was so heinous it was almost hard to believe it really happened. 

Then I started thinking about Dennis Rodman's part in all of this. Dennis Rodman, of all people! First of all, who even knows if it's true, if he paid, offered to pay, whatever. But what if it was true? As far as I can tell, Dennis Rodman didn’t know James Byrd or his family, he is not from Texas (he’s a Jersey boy, as it turns out), and obviously he would have had no responsibility to cover the funeral charge. So other than hearing the news coverage and wanting to help a family in need, I have no idea what his motive could be.

Dennis Rodman is known for many things, but giving of himself without seeking the recognition of the media is not one of them. He’s pictured by many (including me) as this:

Or this:

Or maybe even this:

But when I read about him paying (the stories differed: one said he offered and one said he actually did. They both said he also gave the family 25K as a gift) for this man’s funeral because his family couldn’t afford it, I was completely floored. I remember 24/7 media coverage of this event but I don’t remember hearing anything about Dennis Rodman getting involved.

Just as a reminder to myself, I looked up what Dennis was doing that year. 1998 was the height of his fame/infamy—he was a superstar with the Chicago Bulls and it was in that year that they won their third championship in a row. He was in full bay boy mode—I think that was when he was dating Madonna and appearing in a wedding dress to promote his book.

So I guess to come out and say you have a heart and that you want to step up and do the right thing simply for the reason that it’s the right thing to do—well, that probably would have hurt his street cred as an obnoxious hothead. Now I’m starting to think he had me fooled all along and that Dennis Rodman was never as bad as he wanted us to believe. Maybe Dennis Rodman had a heart of gold underneath all those tattoos, flamboyant clothing, and in-your-face personality. I just figured there wasn't anything more to this man than what I saw... shame on me for being lazy and making easy assumptions. 

Everyone’s got a persona that they broadcast to the world—whether you’re a celebrity or a stay-at-home mom. Sometimes who you are is who you portray yourself as but as I’m realizing, sometimes it may not be. Everyone has a story to tell and I obviously needed a reminder to dig deeper and not always believe what people put out there for public consumption. Headlines are just headlines, but I want to read the entire article. 

RIP James Byrd.

Passion Vs. Reality: Which Do You Choose?

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the following quote from Steve Jobs (as told to his biographer, Walter Isaacson):

“We're always talking about following your passion. But we're all part of the flow of history... And we take things out of that flow that other people have created. And that's why our lives are so great. So you've got to put something back into the flow of history that's going to help your community, help other people, so that 20, 30, 40 years from now, even if it's a small pebble you put back in, people will say, this person didn't just have a passion, he cared about making something that other people could benefit from."

We need money to live—it’s as simple as that. It may be all well and good to be broke at 22 but after that, it’s not ideal. So how can one resolve “doing what you love so you never work a day in your life” (gotta love that one) with also needing a paycheck? And what about giving something back to society? I always used to think it would have been great if I were one of those people who always wanted to be a doctor or always wanted to be a lawyer. But what I wanted to be was a writer. Besides J.K. Rowling and a few others, who makes a living writing?

Is passion alone enough? In this time of record-breaking unemployment, I wonder if instead of focusing on my “passion” and becoming an unsuccessful playwright and then a (fairly) successful TV writer, I had, say, gotten an actual skill, where would I be now? Maybe I would be a computer programmer or an artisan cheesemaker or the founder of Kiva or something. But then again, if I were a cheesemaker, maybe I would have started my own business and it had subsequently gone bust when the housing market crashed and people were no longer buying $30 ounces of cheese. I don’t know.

The conclusion I have come to is that following your passion is fabulous, if your passion happens to be something you can make a living doing. I think I have also realized that passions can be hobbies—and that doesn’t mean you’re a “sell out.” Passions can be something you do outside of work, which is what you need to do to pay your bills. And if you’re lucky, maybe you can figure out a way to make your passion and your work exist in the same plain—organize an ultimate Frisbee team at your office, if Frisbee is your thing. If you’re a budding chef, convince your company that you can cater the next party yourself. Don’t give up! The point is, it doesn’t have to be all or nothing. You maybe want to be an artist but no one wants to be starving. 

We'll miss you, Neil Armstrong

Yesterday, Neil Armstrong died at age 82. For the people who saw his famous moon walk (the original and definitely the best) back in 1969, I bet it was life-altering. It was probably one of those events that begged the question, “Do you remember where you where when you saw Neil Armstrong walk on the moon?” I read that nearly half a billion people were glued to their TV (black and white!) screens to watch him. Countless others listened on radios.  

What a different world it was back then: America was deeply embroiled in a space race with Russia, not to mention a larger Cold War. The Vietnam War was going on. Woodstock was only in the planning stages and with all the political and social turmoil going on, an American becomes the first person to set foot on the moon. The moon! I can only imagine the feelings of unrestrained joy and pride that people must have felt that day. I think if something like that happened today, politicians would clamber to quickly take credit for it, announce it as their brainchild, and then include it in their re-election ads with a thoughtful but compelling voiceover.   

In recent years, it seems like NASA has lost its prominence in popular culture and I remember feeling sad when, a couple of years ago, the President talked about shifting away from government-aided space programs and letting private companies basically take over the area. Are astronauts now obsolete? I hope not. There are few issues in our modern era that haven’t become divisive points for political debate—but I think space exploration ought to be one of them.

And whether you agree or disagree that we, as a nation, should spend money on figuring out exactly what else is out there, I hope we can all take the directive of Armstrong’s family: “Next time you walk outside on a clear night and see the moon smiling down at you, think of Neil Armstrong and give him a wink.”